“Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” Matthew 11:29-30
“Cast your burden upon the Lord, and He will sustain you; He will never allow the righteous to be shaken.” Psalm 55:22
The “burdens” of motherhood. Wow, it can feel almost intolerable. Since becoming a mother, I can’t believe how many “things” I hold on to. In talking with my therapist, she has helped me to realize that perhaps the “things” that I hold on to contribute greatly to feeling overwhelmed with my kids. Yes, the kids have needy, sometimes annoying, behaviors that drain my energies, but perhaps the burdens that I carry also drain my energies.
It seems that each day brings a new set of “burdens,” or things that I hold on to in my head, aka my thoughts. For me, my primary negative thoughts or emotions usually center around guilt, or “should” statements. A few examples: I shouldn’t have yelled at him, I should be playing with the kids more, I should be cleaning my house right now, I should have held him more as a baby, I should, shouldn’t, or should have…
Worry is another burden that I often hold on to. I worry for my children’s skills, abilities, character, etc. For example, will he ever learn to count correctly? Will he ever learn to listen better? Will the tantrums ever stop? And after so many of these thoughts, by the end of the day I’m exhausted! Both by the kids’ behaviors, but also by my own burdens that I bear.
Other days I am burdened by my anxiety, perhaps anxious that I have so many things to do and how will I ever get them done in time? One thing that I have learned to try to do is in the morning to surrender my “to do” list to God, telling Him that I have a lot to do, but to trust that He will help me to prioritize my tasks with the amount of time I have. And then it is my choice to let go of whatever I don’t get done, rather than holding on to the anxiety of it.
Other days I am just very tired and in some ways I hold on to that tired feeling by continually reminding myself how tired I am, or worrying that I won’t get through the day. I dream about sleep and then sometimes sleep doesn’t come as easily.
In dealing with these “burdens,” many of us cope in different ways. Sometimes we cry a little, eat a dessert, dream of a break, vent to our husband or a friend, and other times we scroll our phones hoping for relief by viewing happiness on the other side of the screen. At the end of the day, I’ve found that these coping mechanisms frequently let us down, as they are not lasting and really do not cure the problem. Why? Because in so doing, we continue to hold on to our burdens and haven’t really let them go.
Jesus knew that we would have burdens, especially as mothers. In Psalms 55:22, it says, “Cast your burden upon the Lord, and He will sustain you.” It doesn’t say to cast your burden on other things, but primarily to cast them on Him. What a gracious God we serve that would take on, or even welcome our burdens!
So next time that I am feeling burdened by motherhood, I want to ask God, “Lord, what am I holding on to here? Is it worry, fear, guilt, stress, or something else?” And I know that in response He will quickly show me.
And then I hope that I am able to LET IT GO…to let GO of the burden, and no longer choose to hold on to it (because really it IS a choice). May I cast that burden on the Lord, realizing that I am an imperfect mother, but that He is a perfect God. I will make mistakes, but His grace can and will make up the difference in my parenting.
When I’m guilty, let me receive His grace.
When I’m anxious, let me claim His promises of peace.
When I’m frustrated, let me talk to Him about it.
When I’m tired, may I find my rest in Him.
When you’re burdened, lay down your burdens at HIS feet. Experience the freedom that comes with surrender, and let it go, mama, let it go.